Couples Counseling, How Can it Help?

 

Relationships can be so challenging, but with a little support, some guidance and some work they can also be remarkable! Through my own journey I have been fortunate to have experienced both the challenges and amazing benefits of a strong relationship. I have been blessed to have been happily married for many years. Though it was not always easy, it took work, dedication, and a willingness for both of us to grow and learn. It also required us to accept that we make mistakes which can result in hurt feelings. Doing the work to learn better tools, truly empathize with each other and communicate helped us to grow.

Many people struggle with finding ways to communicate in a way that we can be heard and struggle with listening to understand and validate our partners.  Most couples struggle with this from time to time in their relationships, but some couples have conflict daily.  Frequent conflict can feel overwhelming and can escalate if it never gets resolved.

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I have been blessed to have worked with many couples and have thoroughly enjoyed helping them to find their own ways of communicating and connecting.

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 I have found that there are some primary difficulties that most couples have:

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1. Communicating emotions effectively

2. Understanding what we need from each other and communicating that clearly without demands or manipulation

3. Getting caught in a cycle of arguing over little things rather than resolving actual issues- Arguing about arguing

4. Finding a “bad guy”, trying to identify or isolate the one person to blame without taking personal responsibility

5. Understanding our basic fears of loosing love and safety

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All of these issues and more can be worked through when you work with a skilled couples counselor. It can be difficult to reach out to a stranger for help but it can change your life and your relationship for the better.  I encourage you to reach out for a free initial phone consultation and find out if a family counselor can help you.  Continually living in conflict is not only painful but can also feel like there is no way out. 

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Couple’s counseling can help you learn how to:

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1. Communicate in a way that your partner can understand

2. Learn how each of you contribute to the conflict

3. Empower you to approach conversations in a productive way to reduce conflict

4. Learn tools to recognize and break the cycle of arguing to argue and get back to finding solutions

5. Learn how to deeply connect and reduce basic fears with finding connection and safety in your relationship